P.S. Don't Wear Crocs- And Other Generally Obvious Life Advice From The Ginger

1. Learn to drive a stick. Do it. I promise you WILL use it someday.

2. Always go out in public dressed like you're going to meet the love of your life. Also, if you die, that's the outfit your ghost will be wearing for the rest of it's life. At least one of those should be pretty strong motivation for you.

3. At-home, DIY piercings are not the best idea.

4. Same goes for haircuts.

5. And tattoos. It doesn't matter how bad your impulse issues are, please find some other destructive outlet that maybe isn't as permanent and potentially toxic.

6. Take LOTS of pictures.With people. Of people. Places. Firsts and lasts. I've never regretted taking too many pictures, but I have regretted missed shots.

7. If it takes more than 2 tries to open a door, you're doing something wrong. Or the door is locked. And if it's locked, maybe you shouldn't be trying to open it. Maybe it's a bathroom. And maybe someone's crying in the bathroom and doesn't want you to see their mascara-streaked ugly cry and that's why they locked the door.

8. Spite is a fantastic motivator.

9. Sing in the shower and dance as you get ready for the day. Maybe you look stupid, but it's fun and I can't think of a single time I haven't enjoyed myself.

10. Coconut oil, duct tape, clear nail polish, and WD-40. If you own these four products you are capable of anything.

11. If a girl can run in heels, you should be a little intimidated. That ain't easy. The taller and thinner the heels, the more you should fear.

12. As horrible as it is, pants are a social necessity, and you should probably put some on before you leave the house.

13. Don't wear Crocs. If I have to give you an explanation as to why, you have a problem that needs some serious immediate attention. Just don't do it.

14. READ A BOOK FOR CRYING OUT LOUD.

15. Wear sunscreen. It feels gross and icky, and it smells weird, but it's way better than a sunburn. Or, heaven forbid, sun-poisoning or skin cancer.

16. Don't do meth.

17. Pay your bills on time.

18. Duct tape and hair are two things that should never, ever be introduced to each other. Gum you get out with a bit of oil. That little trick doesn't work with duct tape.

19. Never make eye contact while eating a banana. No further elaboration.

20. NEVER. WAKE. A. SLEEPING. CHILD. Children who's naps got cut short have the attitude and temperament of the Devil himself. And although most adults have that same problem, children don't have the decency to contain that wrath.

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